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esprit de corps

MEANING:

noun: A spirit of solidarity; a sense of pride, devotion, and honor among the members of a group.

ETYMOLOGY:

From French esprit (spirit), de (of), corps (body, group).

I love French words.
So, 1st post of the New Year!
You have been warned: it's quite long...

-I Am-

Listening To: Nothing at the moment
Reading: "Civil Disobedience" ~Henry David Thoreau
Craving: Oranges
Thinking About: It's NEW YEAR'S!!

-Quotes-

"When I was in the military, they gave me a medal for killing two men and a discharge for loving one." ~Leonard Matlovich, a gay Vietnam Veteran

"Commandment Number One for any truly civilized society is this: Let people be different." ~David Grayson, journalist/author

Those are "A Thought For Today" quotes from my A.Word.A.Day subscriptions... I was always so preoccupied with the vocab words that I never saw the quotes! They're pretty inspirational...

-Today's Playlist-

"Simple And Clean" ~Utada
"Cross Your Fingers" ~Laura Marling [I love her!!]
"Hair" ~The Early November
"Sushi" ~Kyle Andrews
"Pumpkin Soup" ~Kate Nash
"Breathe Me" ~Sia
"That Green Gentleman (Things Have Changed)" ~Panic At The Disco
"I Belong To You (+Mon cœur s'ouvre à ta voix)" ~Muse
"Time & Confusion" ~Anberlin
"Konstatine" ~Something Corporate

-Current Obsessions-

Finishing my collage for HSD [High School Diplomats]
Mini-sets and surreal sets on Polyvore
PeterPan-Syndrome on DeviantArt
[Clicky!]
Old Seventeen magazines
Layering clothes
Winter break... it's almost over :(
Alice in Wonderland t-shirts
Muffins
My black sparkly Converses
New Year's! 2010!

-Thoughts-



I remember when I was so fascinated by how Matt traced veins on his arms...
Aha.

So yesterday we went to a New Year Eve's party, like every other year. I wish I could've gone to see fireworks, or something. I really want to be in Times Square to see the ball drop sometime in my life! At first I felt really awkward 'cause all the girls seemed to know each other and they were all much younger than me... but then I started talking to this girl who seemed like a bit of a loner and thus our adventures began. Like the other girls were talking about their boyfriends and crushes and school drama, and I thought they must be in middle school or something. BUT. It turns out they're only 5th and 6th graders!!! What?! :O Wow, I was kinda shocked there. I can't believe people have so much relationship drama stuff in 6th grade... I used to think 10 years old is really old though. I guess I still do. The girl I was talking to was 11, and she's a HUGE Panic At The Disco and Fall Out Boy fan. Everyone else was wearing Abercrombie and skinny jeans, and I might've spotted some makeup... On 6th grade girls. I don't really like girls wearing makeup that young, it's like... you don't need it! Goodness. And they all had high-tech phones, and everyone had an iTouch. Wow.... a few girls were just texting and going on Facebook the whole time. It's like, "You can do that at home... you're at a party, have fun?" Um... yeah. So the girl showed me some YouTube videos. Happy Tree Friends [thank goodness, no Salad Fingers... he's creeeeepy >.<], Fall Out Boy stuff, "Draw With Me" [sooo good.... it's an animation about this boy and girl who are separated by a glass wall -----> Clicky!] And then my mum walked in on us while she was showing me "Hollywood Whore" ~Papa Roach, there was blood everywhere in the video and it was embarrassing... aha.

So the girl whose house we were at turned 11! And her friends are soooo loud... just like screaming and making funny noises for no reason! So yeah, so me and the loner girl started walking around 'cause we didn't have anything better to do [everyone else went to the same school and were gossiping]. And we kept on bumping into this guy who was also walking around... turns out he's a freshman in high school. But he was playing table hockey with this really petite Korean girl and getting beat up by her, it was so funny x) She is vicious! And we were blasting music on people's iPods really loudly, except "Viva La Vida" kept on playing on repeat about 20 times... Eeeeeh. I got so tired of that song by the end of the night! So I put my iPod in and the guy wanted to listen to rap and rock stuff, so we were playing Green Day and stuff...

Then we watched the ball drop [it's only like 30 seconds of excitement...] and the adults started the longest poker game ever. I think there should be a Guiness World record for it or something. And everyone left except this small Chinese girl with pigtails and this really hyper, energetic Whasian girl. She's so funny. And people started drifting off to sleep but me and Claire [the Whasian girl] were determined not to [I can't anyway, I'm not sleeping over!]. So we started performing "Bohemian Rhapsody" like a drama, with all the funny voices and motions and stuff.... we were so loud that I don't think the other girls could sleep! Mission accomplished, aha. And then we started talking about her sisters who go to TJ [BOTH of them!] and philosophy, and how she writes poetry... She is so mature for a 10-year old... I never would have thought. So she was like, "I have a 3rd person voice, a fantasy voice, a poetry voice, and stuff..." So we actually had a pretty good conversation. Her older sister is so talented, by the way. Like wow... her voice, and she's so pretty! But yeah, and she was saying how guys at TJ try to outdo each other with asking girls to prom. She said her sister's boyfriend drove to TJ at midnight to put up a banner asking her to prom! Lol. Those kids :p And we started playing the Questions game, and talked about if we were guys, about how she thought roses were the perfect flower of love [she is SO metaphorical and was talking in poetry talk the whole time...] and we didn't fall asleep! It's so interesting to see different sides of people. Like before, she was SOOOO hyper [I really got scared] and she was mad 'cause she didn't save her top score on a game, and she started punching pillows and cursing and stuff. But then in that room, at like 3 in the morning, she was so thoughtful and philosophical... it's really a different, quiet side...

When my parents -finally- finished playing cards, it was 4:30 a.m.
I didn't sleep at all.
Happy 2010 everyone! :D

Make a wish! :D
[I actually stayed up until 11:11 p.m. to take this!]

Disregard this.

-start rant-

Why must some people be skinnier than others?
Why must some people have really slim upper bodies but curvier lower bodies?
Or vice versa (is "vice versa" Latin, by the way...?)
It's just so disproportional!
And anorexia videos are so so sad, especially combined with really moving music.
It can really make you cry.
Have you ever felt like you could just eat and eat and eat and you're not even hungry?
Like a music binge or chat binge, but instead it's a food binge?
You're just bored, or rummaging around your kitchen for anything, something, but there's nothing good to eat anyway.
And after you eat something salty, you have to counter-balance it with something sweet, to neutralise it, so you just end up eating more and it's a cycle and you start to wonder, "Well, what if I just threw up?"
But then the thought of sticking your fingers down your throat and puking seems too gross and revolting to actually do, and that would probably mark you as a bulimic, so you don't.
And then you heat up that disgusting Campbell's Condensed Soup with Spongebob Squarepants noodles in it, but you add too much water and then dump it down the drain, but place the dirty bowl in the sink so it would look like you ate it, but you really didn't.
So this post basically has alot of run-on sentences and bad grammar and whatnot, but who cares?
It's hard being a grammar&spelling Nazi.
So you're walking home from school, really determined that you're just going to WORK when you get home. On homework.
And so you do, but then you're supposed to be working on debate speeches and researching topics.
Instead, you go on Polyvore and make a whole bunch of secret sets and favourite everybody's stuff and also chat with people.
But finally you focus and manage to write a few outlines. Whew.
So after dinner, you call your best friend and you can talk about anything, and you start talking about pregnancy, and teen pregnancy and you feel so bad for those teen mums with a kid...
Put them up for adoption, keep it, or... -gasp- Shall I say abortion?
Of course not the latter, but your friend thinks so.
And adoption instead of having kids in the future because she doesn't want to pass her skin disease to her kids... that's probably for the best.
Somehow the conversation moves to how there are mice in your friend's house and how she hate mice, she wants to kill them all viciously.
And creepy Edgar Allan Poe stories, disappearing lineages, and incest.
"Do you realise that if everyone just adopted kids, your lineage/family would disppear?"
What if you're dying to see what's it's like to be an anoretic, even though you know everything about the disease and that it's really self-destructing?
What if you feel like your brain's going to explode with all the things you have to do?
What if you hate looking at yourself because you look weird...?
What if you're nervous about finally going back into debate and giving speeches in front of 20-30 people again?
What if your friend's boyfriend just gave her a dozen roses, and he's usually a really pessimistic, cynical guy? It's just so nauseatingly cute and then you want to pretend it never happened 'cause you can't imagine someone like that doing something so romantic and... nice.
What if you're really hoping for a special visit?
What if you see people hugging and holding hands and wish they'd realise how lucky they are that they're together, right there? Not separated by miles and miles or oceans? :p
What if you feel like you're leading a double life occasionally, with being happy at school but then so messed-up and having dangerous thoughts when you're alone? "Thoughtcrime IS death."
What if you sneaked the phone out of the house to call someone, but then you realise that your dad might be starting a telephone conference so you can't use the phone?
What if...............................................?

-end rant-



I want her hair.

"WAIT. They don't love you like I love you."

It's TWLOHA Day! (To Write Love On Her Arms Day)
Cat was the only one who did, I don't think alot of people remembered...
http://www.twloha.com/index.php
I want a t-shirt like that :3

Being immersed in a world of crazy talking animals (Animal Farm),
Panicking over how to be a good presiding officer for debate,
Figuring out how the heck to do the physics & AP chem webassign,
Listening to Noah and the Whale/The Yeah Yeah Yeahs,
Daydreaming about Thanksgiving break,
Hoping for a surprise visit [fingers crossed!],
Maybe I'm actually starting to like square brackets,
And looking forward to "secret phone calls."
Perhaps.
Maybe?

Yes; yes; definitely.
Today was pretty good for Friday the 13th.
But then again I'm not too superstitious x)

Just meet me up in paradise

^An amazing photo of my friend - the rainbowness is actually a reflection of a CD! :D

"So let me show you
Some-thing super beautiful
Let's rock the boat
The magic is unstoppable!"

-Playlist-

1. "Tell Yourself" ~Clazziquoi
2. "Cheated Hearts" ~ Yeah Yeah Yeahs
3. "On The Bus Mall" ~The Decemberists
4. "Beautiful Day" ~U2
5. "Boston" ~Augustana
6. "Don't Stop Believin'" ~Glee cast version (they make everything sound so good!!)
7. "Les Bonbons" ~Jacques Brel
8. "Don't Upset The Rhythm (Go Baby Go)" ~Noisettes
9. "Wonderwall" ~Oasis
10. "Keep Holding On" ~Glee cast version

Such a cool video ----> Clicky!

-Quote-

Growing up...

Our best friend becomes your enemy. Lollipops turn into cigarettes. The innocent ones turn into sluts. Homework goes in the trash. Mobile phones are being used in class. Detention becomes suspension. Soda becomes vodka. Undies turn into g-strings. Kisses turn into sex. Remember when high meant swinging on the playground? when protection meant wearing a helmet? when the worst thing you could get from boys was cooties? Dad's shoulders were the highest place on earth and Mom was your hero? Your worst enemies were your siblings. Race issues were about who ran the fastest. War was only a card game. The only drug you knew was cough medicine. Wearing a skirt didn't make you a slut. The only things that hurt you were skinned knees. And goodbyes only meant until tomorrow, and we couldn't wait to grow up?

Taken from a Polyvore set -----> Clicky!



Rainbow cake-in-a-jar I made awhile back! It was really difficult and quite violent to get out... Lol. But ever since I made them once for school, this guy at my bus stop has been begging me to make them... I'm like, "It's just food colouring!" x)

-Random thoughts-

Blogging is kind of boring... But I don't have any new secrets on Polyvore at the moment. I need to start getting better grades in school 'cause they are quite atrocious... I have to write a paper about nerds for AP Lang, which sounds fun :D

The weather is ridiculously cold, and I need to buy new clothes... school is stressful and it's the almost last week of 1st quarter!!!! Already!!

I'm going to die.
It may be the first time I have a whole spectrum of A's to D's on my report card.
And I REFUSE to let that happen!!!!!
Whyyy is AP US so hard?! I absolutely love the class and I'm NOT dropping out no matter what! But still!
At least a 13/15 on an essay is better than 3/10.

Thank you everyone! - Hyper Overdose by LittleMissSecret on Polyvore.com

-Obsessions-

Of course, the top 10 list.

1. Purple!
2. Acid-washed jeans
3. Cardigans
4. Anything warm
5. Someone... :)
6. Beautiful colour-changing autumn trees
7. Debate/speech
8. Glee!!
9. Playing piano versions of songs ----> Clicky!
10. Friendship bracelets

No. 132 by LittleMissSecret on Polyvore.com

I think that is the cutest picture ever!! :)

If I could rearrange the periodic table...

I would put Iodine and Uranium together.
(I and U! Like I love you... me and you together... get it?)
A chemistry joke from Cat... lol.

Music list :)

1. "Sink Or Swim" ~Tyrone Wells
2. "1234 asIAN remix" ~Feist
3. "Sing For Absolution (Acoustic)" ~Muse
4. "Hometown Glory" ~ADELE
5. "Space Dementia" ~Muse
6. "The Outside" ~Taylor Swift
7. "Inseparable" ~Jonas Brothers
8. "Bulletproof" ~La Roux
9. "Morning Lullabies" ~Ingrid Michaelson
10. "If I Talk To God ~The Last Goodnight

I'll add the YouTube links later..... AP chem and history calls. It's all so confusing... I feel like I can't even get the easiest labs right, but I'm clearly doing all the calculations accurately!! So odd >.< But...

The Muse concert is in THREE days!!!!!!!!! :D I'm so excited!!!!

"Kamikazi airplanes in the sky
Are we going down or will we fly?"

I love that line from "Sink Or Swim." Thanks Cat!

"I like it in the city when two worlds collide
You get the people and the government
Everybody taking different sides."

"Even when we're miles and miles apart
You're still holding all of my heart..."

Dix-sept ans!!!

Oh my goodness.

So at 12:00 a.m. today, I turned 17! Is that surreal or whaat? I feel pretty old now x) But my friends were all very lovely and gave me gifts! Aaaw.

The rainbow cupcakes and brownies turned out good, and I ended up giving brownies to everyone in my AP chem class 'cause I felt bad since I was only giving it to my friends... My teacher even set aside time for us to eat even though we're never supposed to eat in that class :D Awesomeee. Perhaps my rainbow cupcake will convince her to not fail me on our massive, epic-ly hard test on Thursday!

Z pizza + Starbucks possibly tonight...
And phone calls! :D

Love is our resistance

^The new Muse album isn't -that- bad. Which is good. But definitely inferior to Black Holes & Revelations!! Nothing beats that :p "Resistance" is really 1984-esque. Like I can just picture it as being the soundtrack to the book or something. Annnd... I can't get "I Belong To You (+Mon Cœur S’ouvre À Ta Voix) out of my head... "I've travelled half the world the say/I belong to you." Exogenesis: Symphony Part II (Cross Pollination) is the best of the symphony in my opinion. It's magical! But enough about that.

Today was a great day! The weather is sooo sunny and wonderful, and my friend came over afterschool and we walked around in the Sunshine Circle. And later I took pictures of these really pretty flowers. They were all bathed in sunshine and looking so lovely! So colourful and nice... It reminded me of the Alice in Wonderland photo shoot I had, for some reason. Probably just the nice weather!

And I tried orange marmalade for the first time today. My dad's trying to get us to try something new every week. And starfruit!! It reminds me of someone :D But I don't know how to eat it... lol.

So today my friend told me that out of all the AP lang classes, there were only two people who got perfect A's on their essay... And guess who?? I was one of them!!! :D And our teacher read my essay to the class and at the end, everyone was clapping.... It was a bit embarrassing, but wow! I can't believe that my teacher thought it was that good >.< Actually, he said the language was really beautiful, but he didn't quite understand the end at all... Aha. Oh well. Invincible!!

And now I have to bake rainbow cupcakes/brownies for tomorrow.
I don't even have that much hw!!! Yayness. I guess I'll just be reading 1984 and making friendship bracelets tonight.

"If we've got to burn out, let's do it together."

"When our tele's are six hours away
Please call to say that you miss me, feel me, or whatever."

"Suffer For Fashion" ~Of Montreal

39 days!!! A whole afternoon of baking for my grandparents, then airplanes and fluffy clouds tomorrow! Aaaaah!

I'll miss you.



A photo of the glittery rainbow facets of a sparkly sticker :D

Pools of sorrow, waves of joy are drifting through my open mind...

Random thoughts... a picture post!

P.S. I have no idea why I can't change the font size for some reason... Tis extra large!! >.<



1. I really need to get an underwater camera!!! I was at the pool with my friend and desparately wanted one!! Capturing the bubbles and coolness... Can you take regular photos with an underwater camera? If so, I'll probably wear a camera around my neck everyday ;D



2. I love making "remixes" of songs where I change the lyrics... I did this one for "Five Years Time" by Noah and the Whale. I've also done "Geek in the Pink" and "Runaway Love." Oh yeah, and "Girlfriend." Lol... Here's the original -----> Clicky!

"Five Years Time"
By: Noah and the Whale

"Two Years Time"
By: Aimme and the Kitty (Aimme and the Cat?? Lol)

Oh well, in two years time we could be standing on a bridge
With the sun shining down on me and you
And there'll be love in the bodies of the little duckies too
And I'll put my hand over your eyes, but you'll peek through

And there'll be sun sun sun
All over our faces
And sun sun sun
All over our bodies
And sun sun sun
All down my neck
Oh and sun sun sun
So what the heck

'Cause I'll be laughing at all your silly little jokes
And we'll be laughing about how we used to have
All those pieces of colourful string
Two friendship bracelets

'Cause it's what we needed to have a good time

But it was fun fun fun

When we were chillin'

It was fun fun fun

When we were chill

And it was fun fun fun

When we were talking

It was fun fun fun

Oh it was fun

Well, then I look at you and say,

"It's the happiest that I've ever been."

And I'll say, "I no longer feel I have to be Audrey*."

And he'd say, "Yeah well, I feel pretty happy too.

And I'm always pretty happy when I'm just kicking back with you."

And it'd be

Love love love

All through our bodies

And love love love

All through our minds

And it'll be love love love

All over his face

And love love love

All over mine

And though, if nearly all these moments are just in my head

I'll be thinking about them as I'm lying in bed

And I know that none of it may really ever come true

But in my dreams I'm havin' an amazing time with you

Oh in two years time

I will see you and...

In two years time

We might've changed

Oh in two years time

Hopefully it will fly by

In two years time

Let's be cool together

But there'll be love love love

Wherever you go

There'll be love love love

Wherever you go

There'll be love love love

Wherever you go

There'll be love love love

Wherever you go

There'll be love love love

Wherever you go

There'll be love love love

Wherever you go there'll be love

*Audrey Hepburn... couldn't think of something appropriate :/

3. Tis a super-long post... But it's to make up for the month I'll be away! So it's justified... :p

4. "Across the Universe" by the Beatles is such a pretty song... I discovered it through the movie of the same name... (Go watch it! It's great!) I loooove how the first photo fits the lyric perfectly!!

"Images of broken light which dance before me like a million eyes."

"Limitless undying love which shines around me like a million suns."

"Jai guru deva om/Nothing's gonna change my world."

5. I'm leaving for Beijing tomorrow and it'll be a month before I'm back... Well see you in August. Hope it'll be a good goodbye party... 5 weeks. 2 years. We need a time countdown for all these things... Aha.

Here's a collage I made on the last day of school.... I made about 5 more collages after that... But none of them as inspiring.....

Matching picuters... Well. Au revoir!!!!!

This Tornado Loves You

No more finals!!! No more homework!!

That's a relief... I was so glad to be done with my algebra one... But I ended up with a C for the year anyway. It's so annoying how algebra is bringing everything down! I have an A in everything else... I should've taken regular! But whatever... I can't believe tomorrow is the last day of school though. Time goes by terribly fast...

So my friend came over and we made brownie cookies! It's quite fun stumbling for food recipes... You should try it sometime. So I didn't really get the concept of brownie cookies at first, but they're actually cookies... but made using brownie mix! And we made a goodbye card for my friend who's moving to Paris... I'm going to be sad when she leaves...

Today's such a surprise-y kind of day... Then my hippie friend came over on her skateboard and said she was going to skateboard all the way to Fair Oaks Mall, which is like... 2 hours away from my house... She's so brave. I would get lost immediately! But she started skateboarding in school and it was so cool. I wish I took a video! Next thing you know, it's going to be on America's Best Home Videos or something... Lol.

Friday is going to be... fun-ish.. I'm going to see Up in 3D this time (yeah, again... I like that movie!) with my friend, and going to the mall... But then I'm seeing someone for almost the last time. Well at least I'll get to see my two friendship bracelets... yay! The pattern must be very unique... :)

J'ai eu un quatre-vingt onze dans mon examen finale pour le français... Je ne crois pas! J'ai pensé que je recevoir au moins quatre-vingt quatorze... Mais c'est d'accord. Hmm... j'ai reçu un B+ dans presque tout mes examens finales... excepté dans l'algèbre, bien sûr...

Anyways! I'm wearing the AP shirt Cat made... It's black and white.